15 Week Lobster

Am 15 weeks now and kids are still away. Aaron and I decided to bite the bullet and go camping with our new tent. Aaron decided was a nice idea to take me to the place he has been before on the Murray up near Blanch town. The initial spot had over grown in reeds so we moved on to a camping ground across the other side of the lagoon. It was about 20*c and very very windy. The tent looked like it was constantly blowing away but we managed to light a small fire to cook some damper and chuck the lines out. Aaron caught 1 carp and I managed to loose 5. The lines we had kept snapping so overall I got lots of fish to shore just couldn’t get them out of the water. I also sat and read some of my book. During this time thought it would be a good idea to get a belly tan. Little did I know the sun was burning us all over both Aaron and I got burnt on our faces, Aarons back and my arms and belly. Even with sunscreen on the cool wind had fooled us into believing we were ok. So today after a horrid night trying to sleep with soreness all over we packed up and came home.

Our poor baby is sitting in my belly probably happily doing its baby stuff while the outside is baking. To top it off the old stretch marks from the other kids are all blistered… I have sent Aaron down to get some aloe for my poor belly….

On a lighter note time is ticking by...

25 weeks to go that’s 175 days to go.

And

Till the ultrasound so we can see if OR

Baby Names

The topic has been brought up and for me I like to name my kids before birth and prefably have a name picked before finding out the gender in 5 weeks.

This is the list we have thought of so far.... Not loving any of the girls names yet but leaning heavily on some of the boys names....

Noah

Elijah

Lochlan

Sienna

Cailyn

Brianna

Keira

Elsie

Kayla

Claire

Layla

Erin

Christmas Day

Is Christmas today been very hard without the kids as they are all away as much as I know this is the last time ever I will be childless at Christmas. The kids go see their other parent alternate years so every second year we have all 3 then the next is NONE. As much as this year I was focused on the fact it was time for Aaron and I, I was so teary and on edge about the fact the kids were not with me. My 2 went to QLD and have been gone for a few days and I am dying for them to come home. When Jake rings he says “you’re so far away from you mum.” I feel like a knife stabbing me. Rachel rang today and had a tantrum because she wanted to play; as much as I know she is busy with the other kids I was hurt. I could hear she was tired and when she ended up calling later she said she was tired and had a long sleep today. Keeley was with her mum today and we will pick her up Saturday wasn’t as bad knowing she is home so soon but I also know when she gets here she will also be so upset and blobby, pining for the other 2.

The only savior for missing my kids so badly and ANOTHER Christmas I had planned to spend with my folks I couldn’t get to see them was the fact after next June never will Aaron and I spend a Christmas alone. We will only get all together alternate yearly but I know when we are without the other 3 I will have our baby to cuddle and pine too.

Today we went to Nan’s house for lunch. We spent the night last night at the Rendezvous and had a wonderful breakfast this morning. I showed everyone the scan pictures which was a bit of a hoot, Kate thinks it looks like a potato, Nan thinks it was tiny and Karen now believes I am really pregnant and not just eating too much. We had lots of laughs and chatted about names and genders etc. I wasn’t not a good girl I eat all the wrong things including 2 oysters and 5 prawns. I also ate way too much but I always do that. I had champagne and OJ which was so yummy and wonderful Christmas drinks but needed to go back to OJ or soft drink as gave me light headedness with barely ½ a cup, Shows how much your body changes without any for 3 months.

On Christmas eve Aaron and I went to see the psychiatrist she up my dose of meds so I can sleep better. I also got the NT scan results Down Syndrome 1:9999 so nice and low for us not to worry about. Funny enough says my EDD was 24th June 2009. I will be bringing that up with Gus when I see him on 12/1/09.

My Christmas Day Belly

Walking

REMINDER FOR MYSELF

Since Aaron is out of work and work is so slow for me we have decided to take up dropping of junk mail. The walk is 3hours each area!!! And in Athelstone which is hills country. There is 250 drops in my area and killer hills. I hate I doing it as I have to carry a back pack and front pack of junk mail which is so heavy, surprisingly after each walk I actually feel good. My muscles are sore but head wise I feel so much more alert and happy. I am very sore and needed a nana rest after but overall I feel great again. So the past 2 times we have done it I have been happier so as much I hate doing it I think it is good for me. I am writing this down for 1 reason when I feel really off I want to remind myself to get up and go for a walk or ride this may be away to prevent the inevitable from coming sooner than later.

12 and 1 day again

I went to see the ob today and they changed my dates AGAIN… so now is the 28/9/09...which is a laugh I got my BFP 3dpo but the stupid Ob wouldn’t listen to that- so it changes again. That frustrates me because they never listen!!!

She didn’t have my NT results even though she called up they were not there. She said not to worry if they needed too they would call for a follow up. She said be aware it was on the high side for the fold test but my age should drop that a lot and will see what Blood test says. So now do I call during the week to see what it is or do I leave it???

We heard heart be on Doppler 163bmp. Got my scan for 2/2/09 for morph u/s. I am measured normal *apparently*. BP was 110/60 always is lower in preg than normally.

I am feeling pretty pissed off with my dates changing and the fact I am treated like an experiment with my uterus issues so everyone wants to know why, when, how, can they touch, what does it feel like etc..... I am really wanting to go home birth at them moment and to just be pregnant without all the drama the hospital give me. my appointment are 4 weekly for ob, and 4 weekly with urology and psych so ends up weekly attendance b Just being there and fighting with them makes me so angry. I am going to avoid going cause I hate being there so much. I wish we could have a home birth but it isn’t possible for me to watched by the psych team if I am not having the baby there. Is a catch 22 I get sicker from being there but can’t not have them.

Feeling pretty down especially since blood test came back all ok so my mood and fatigue are not anemia related. I am scared they are psych related. I now am worried about the down results too. I wish I could just be like normal women and bloom in pregnancy not fall into a pit of medical problems